DOK

Molé's Marvellous Medicine - The essence of all that is foul...

History of DOK

DOK Stick

The Pritt Stick that started it all off. It was 6 years old (from Year 1) when we first realised it's potential. One English lesson, we devised the name DOK, continually unsure as to why, but probably to mix the names Dope, Crack and Pot, because Ian had a great time sniffing it. We took it to every lesson and added to its greatness by emptying marker pens and pencil shavings into it. It developed a strange spongy ability to soak up ink and stink to hell. We had an airline travel bag full of equipment that enhanced the foulness of DOK Stick, including all kinds of pens, markers and weird stuff. The outside was razorbladed to ribbons (you couldn't see the Pritt Stick logo) and coloured in with strange brown and black pens. It looked the picture of skank, and was thrown away by accident a few years ago (round about year 9).

DOK Book

A small note book, that started off, not as a DOK item, but as a very [very] scrappy and messy simple plain book. The cover got ripped, drawn on and covered completely in ink. Some chewing gum was dropped into the middle pages, gluing them together. An apple core in a plastic bag was taped to the front cover, and left to rot. It eventually turned to liquid when added to...

DOK Jar

A simple Quality Street jar, filled with rotting fruit, which was also thrown away into the bin. Special skills included the ability to dynamically melt a pear as it was dropped in (although it was a VERY mushy rotten pear) and a gradual warming of the jar. It was only brought into school once, but it sparked off a whole chain of DOK creations including Matt Hughes' DOK yoghurt and JR's piece of cheese in a sample container, which I believe is still alive and well, whereas the former was buried in the garden.

DOK Lab Juice

This incorporates parts of Lab Juice into the basic DOK structure. A blue bottle (from an Indigo drink, Wolfberry and Guarana, I think) was used as the container, because it looked good, was translucent and had a good cap that sealed it well (making for plenty of shakings). The results could have been staggeringly dangerous, or not at all. This was an ongoing project by us and was the first DOK that we tried to make contain 1000 ingredients. We recorded everything that went in, in the Bad Book. It contained 57 ingredients (unnervingly reminiscent of Heinz's 57 varieties) when it was mysteriously lost a few days after the Sponsored Walk. When doing a project like this one, it helps to have a base ingredient that is a liquid. About a fifth of the bottle was filled with the Kia-Ora when we started.

Kia-Ora
We went for the first week or so believing this to be apple juice, having kept apple juice in another, similar, container. The apple juice container has had nothing added to it, but has been left to ferment since the beginning.
Sawdust
We're not sure what kind of wood this was, but we know it was cut with a rusty, greasy saw.
Dead Fly
At least we assume it's dead by now...
Glue
The type you get in a twisty glue stick, similar to the original DOK. This glue was good because it already smelt foul before it went in.
Gas
About 5 seconds of gas from a regular school gas tap, quickly trapped in the bottle, and shaken to try to dissolve it in the liquid before it escaped next time we opened it.
Black Ink
Ordinary black cartridge ink from an ordinary cartridge pen.
Plastic Shavings
Plastic from the side of a pen.
Graphite Shavings
Pencil Lead.
Side of a pencil dust
Shavings from the side of a pencil.
Economics book shavings
Torn out corner of several economics books. Oh the respect...
Floor Crisp
Regular crisp of indeterminate flavour. Probably had been on floor for a few days.
Sulphur
Ordinary 1 year old Lab sulphur that had been festering in a safe deposit box since year 9.
Thermite
Special brew of iron oxide and aluminium shavings.
Magnesium Strip
Designed to get the thermite going.
Unknown white powder
We think it might be as old as the sulphur, and probably Sodium Hydroxide.
Biffith's fingernail
Donated during an Economics lesson.
Grass
The green stuff that grows on the lawn.
Green pencil lead
Lead from a green pencil
Green pencil case fluff
Fluff from a green pencil case
A scraping of the book used to note the ingredients in
Until the day when computers are widely used in school, we need exercise book to write the ingredients down as we go along. This is a scraping of it (the Bad Book).
Babybel Wax
Some red wax from the little wax covered cheese snacks.
Copper Sulphate
Regular Copper Sulphate, stolen from a Lab, of course.
More gas
Shaken about to mix it in.
Day old cheese
Exactly what it says. This piece of cheese had abnormally high floor contact for a piece of sandwich cheese.
Yet more gas
You can never have enough...
Phlegm
From a person who shall remain unnamed, despite it quite clearly being Adam.
Iron Sulphate
A basic off-the-Lab-wall chemical, chosen because of it's unique reaction between itself and Sodium Carbonate, namely generating large amounts of fluffy skank.
Sodium Carbonate
See above.
Sliver of Chargrilled Chicken
Fresh from only that lunchtime.
Very green sandwich mould
This sandwich was over two weeks old when we put a bit of the green in. We still have the sandwich, many months (and many inches of green mould) later. SEE DOK BEHIND BIT
Burnt Wood
Burnt by our very own Bunsens.
Tippex
The good old stuff that is banned from school for some obscure reason. It crustified itself around the rim of the bottle.
Thin bits of lead
Lead from those pencils that you click to get more lead out of.
Litmus
Standard indicator solution.
Universal Indicator
Another indicator solution.
Methyl Orange
Yet another indicator.
Phenolpthalein
And another indicator solution. As you can see, we had a field day in Lab 6.
Fizzy bath thing
The kind of thing you get from herbal remedy shops. Utterly ruthless.
Lynx Atlantis
Classic deodorant.
Very concentrated printer ink
Straight from a printer cartridge, this stuff stains absolutely.
Seville Orange Spicer herbal teabag contents
Exported from Work Experience and after spending no less than eight hours in a sweaty shoe, the bag was ripped open and poured into the DOK. It contained in itself Apple Peel, Apple Pieces, Cinnamon, Hibiscus, Roasted Chicory, Rosehip, Orange Peels, Cloves and Citric Acid.
A 2 week old purple skittle
You know skittles, the small balls of colored sugar known as sweets. A very festering one of those.
Ethanol
The classic DOK ingredient. This brings up the flammability rating to an acceptable level.
Leaf (burnt)
Saved from a cruel biology experiment, only to be burnt in a bunsen itself.
Iodine solution
Basic Lab ingredient.
Spider web
Scooped from a corner of Lab 2, very old. Pity there weren't any dead spiders in it...
Right Guard
Autan Insect Repellant
Somerfield Aqua Marine Shower Gel
Lynx Apollo
Magic Bubble Mix
Tea Tree lotion
E45 moisturising cream
Bodyshop Rosemary Reviving Aromatherapy Oil
Pantene Pro-V Conditioner
Royal Jelly Soap

These ingredients were thoroughly well mixed since the bottle was carried around in the side pocket of a bag pretty much to every lesson during the period we had it.

Unfortunately, it is no longer in our possession. Even now, 6 months later, we have still not been able to track it down, so we have officially given up. But we know it's still around. Somewhere. if you find it, please mail it back to us and for God's sake don't touch it.

It had quite a history, with no less than three spillages in Lab 6 and a zero apathy rate (this means out of all the people that smelt it, NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM didn't hate it)

DOK Behind Bit

Over the course of years 9 and 10, MUCH litter was positioned in a certain gap behind a certain locker, less than half an inch in width. It was topped off at the very last minute of year 10 (literally, as we then proceeded to go home for the summer holidays) by a 'blue liquid sandwich', which describes itself to the letter. This was the same sandwich used in the DOK Lab Juice, mentioned above. The summer of 1998 was pretty hot, and since the Behind Bit was right next to a window (well, the leaking sandwich bag had sunlight right on it), we can only imagine the heat and extreme rotting the Behind Bit went through. Although we vacated room 5 in year 11 to do greater things, some people still deposit their food and waste there and we await the day they try to remove the locker and it all falls out! Come to think of it... this is the only surviving DOK. Phew.

The Future

DOK has returned! The following DOK's have been proposed and some even trialed. Most of the following are the many failed DOK's over the years:

DOK locker
this was sort of started in Year 9 when a locker was found to be unoccupied. People put crisp packets in there, and such, but these didn't have the amazing rotting power than a good DOK has. 'Bertson put a piece of banana in though, which was left for several weeks. When we tried to remove it (somebody was moving into the locker), it had gone solid and stripped the paint off the shelf when we eventually prised it out. A partial success, if only because of the laughs it got. Comedy is always the best ingredient for a DOK, as it is for anything.
DOK Wall-Hole
Just outside the changing rooms, there is a small hole in the wall where for some reason the mortar has simply gone. Crisp packets got stuffed there for a few weeks, but the main problem with this was it's lack of space. It quickly filled up, and wasn't very good anyway.
DOK Heater
Back in Year 8, a room heater was found to have a part of the door missing. This was a big mistake as far as the caretaker was concerned, as it enabled us to fill it with all kinds of nasty stuff. One particular piece of tomato we put in was observed a few months later (after we'd figured out how to open the door with two pairs of scissors) and was completely shriveled from the heat. It was probably a good job we didn't put the proposed fish and milk in there, as it was our classroom.
DOK Desk
A certain person managed to get ill for several months, and as his desk was neglected, it began to fill. Crisp packets, everything. For the few months he was away, there was no litter on the floor - it was in his desk. A blue sandwich (the same one featuring in Salt) eventually ended up in the desk. Well, parts of it did. It was brought to an end by the discovery of it and the forced clearing out of it by it's main contributor.
DOK Disk
A small red floppy disk, completely abused, with the magnetic media taken out and cut into a buzzsaw shape. Known fleetingly as the Drive Annihilator, although I suspect total damage to a target system would be less than worth it.

Containers

Every DOK needs a container, because nobody in their right mind or otherwise would want to carry around an uncontained DOK. The Indigo bottle used for DOK Lab Juice was just about perfect, however, the major problem was that it was very hard to see exactly what was inside without holding the bottle up to the light, which was awkward, especially in a lesson. On the other hand, it would have been hard for anybody to see inside who we didn't want seeing inside. The size, however, was perfect as was the shape.

The New DOK Lab Juice

Started on Friday 19th March as a kind of celebration (of both the end of the tech project and the beginning of the Last 10 Chemistry Lessons), it was housed in a clear plastic bottle, and contained the following:

However, when we found a new Indigo bottle, we tried to transfer it, but not even the test paper was salvagable. So as it stands, in it's new blue container, it contains:

April 2nd 1999

April 3rd

At this point, the softmint was partially dissolved

Astute readers of Lab6 may know that we 'accelerated' a banana during Biology on the 15th April 1999. This will either become part of the New DOK Lab Juice or a DOK in it's own right)